Last edit: @kmira in #[IM @kmira] 7 months ago - Slack Archive

{lua}

local linkTable = {
    'https://www.google.com/maps/dir/6600+Dumbarton+Cir,+Fremont,+CA+94555/34793+Ardentech+Ct,+Fremont,+CA+94555/',
    'https://www.amazon.com/Computer-Programming-Volumes-1-4A-Boxed/dp/0321751043',
    'https://www.42.us.org/program/42-starfleet-academy-1-year-software-engineering-program/',
    'https://www.amazon.com/Computers-Seniors-Dummies-Computer-Tech/dp/1119420318',
    'https://media.giphy.com/media/13HgwGsXF0aiGY/giphy.gif?response_id=59245c7c1f1da9f614a280d5'

}

if (args ~= 'public_override' and channel.type ~= "im") then
	print('To get access to this message send `!whelp` in a direct message to Marvin.' .. '\n')
	print('Since this is a public channel I cast shame on you. :troll:')
else
	print('Just got here?\n')
	print('You can send `!ra` to me to see who we got stuck with as Resident Assistants.\n\n')
	print('Want more space in your room?\n')
	print('Try putting one bed ontop of another :exploding_head:\n' .. 'for help send me `!bed`\n\n')
	print('Wifi?\n' .. '`!wifi`?\n')
	print('Wifi-down?\n' .. '`!wifi-update`\n\n')
	print('You brought a car?\n'.. 'Try: heimdall.42.us.org' .. '\n\n')
	print('Hungry?\n' .. 'Send `!menu` to me to see whats cooking.\n')
	print('You might also want to\n' .. 'Check out:\t cantina.42.us.org' .. '\n' .. 'and:\t\t\t sesame.42.us.org' .. '\n\n')
    print('Forgot how to eat?\n' .. 'Send `!sesame` to me in a direct message.\n\n')
    print('Mailing something?\n' .. 'I got you fam. `!address` at me so I can tell you what address to use. Don\'t use the dorms one.\n\n')
    print('Not satisfied with your online order?\n' .. 'Why didn\'t you just `!store` me first?\n\n')
    print('Need to print something?\n' .. 'Send `!printer` to me.\n' .. 'Really need to print something?\n' .. 'Try: `!print`\n\n')
    print('Where are the dorms?\n' .. '`!dorms` at me and I will help you. ')
    print('<' .. linkTable[1] .. '|*This*> may also help you.\n\n' )
    print('Looking for something lost?\n' .. 'Check out the #lost_and_found channel in slack.\n\n')
    print('Looking for someone?\n' .. 'Try: http://campus.42.us.org/' .. '\n' .. 'or: https://tinder.com/?lang=en' .. '\n\n')
    print('Need help programming?\t')
    print('<' .. linkTable[2] .. '|*Yes*>    <' .. linkTable[3] .. '|*No*>\n')
    print('Too Hard?\t\t\t\t\t')
    print('<' .. linkTable[4] .. '|*Yes*>    <' .. linkTable[5] .. '|*No*>\n\n')
    print('Having a mid-life crisis?\n' .. 'Send `!whoami` to me and I will help sort out your problems.\n\n')
    print('Need to chill?\n' .. 'Send `!chill` to me.\n\n')
    print('Need a cat gif?\n' .. 'See: https://media.giphy.com/media/SBIDrovnm0wOA/giphy.gif')
end

History

Revision: 4935 by @kmira in #[IM @kmira] 7 months agoSlack Archive

{lua}

local linkTable = {
    'https://www.google.com/maps/dir/6600+Dumbarton+Cir,+Fremont,+CA+94555/34793+Ardentech+Ct,+Fremont,+CA+94555/',
    'https://www.amazon.com/Computer-Programming-Volumes-1-4A-Boxed/dp/0321751043',
    'https://www.42.us.org/program/42-starfleet-academy-1-year-software-engineering-program/',
    'https://www.amazon.com/Computers-Seniors-Dummies-Computer-Tech/dp/1119420318',
    'https://media.giphy.com/media/13HgwGsXF0aiGY/giphy.gif?response_id=59245c7c1f1da9f614a280d5'

}

if (args ~= 'public_override' and channel.type ~= "im") then
	print('To get access to this message send `!whelp` in a direct message to Marvin.' .. '\n')
	print('Since this is a public channel I cast shame on you. :troll:')
else
	print('Just got here?\n')
	print('You can send `!ra` to me to see who we got stuck with as Resident Assistants.\n\n')
	print('Want more space in your room?\n')
	print('Try putting one bed ontop of another :exploding_head:\n' .. 'for help send me `!bed`\n\n')
	print('Wifi?\n' .. '`!wifi`?\n')
	print('Wifi-down?\n' .. '`!wifi-update`\n\n')
	print('You brought a car?\n'.. 'Try: heimdall.42.us.org' .. '\n\n')
	print('Hungry?\n' .. 'Send `!menu` to me to see whats cooking.\n')
	print('You might also want to\n' .. 'Check out:\t cantina.42.us.org' .. '\n' .. 'and:\t\t\t sesame.42.us.org' .. '\n\n')
    print('Forgot how to eat?\n' .. 'Send `!sesame` to me in a direct message.\n\n')
    print('Mailing something?\n' .. 'I got you fam. `!address` at me so I can tell you what address to use. Don\'t use the dorms one.\n\n')
    print('Not satisfied with your online order?\n' .. 'Why didn\'t you just `!store` me first?\n\n')
    print('Need to print something?\n' .. 'Send `!printer` to me.\n' .. 'Really need to print something?\n' .. 'Try: `!print`\n\n')
    print('Where are the dorms?\n' .. '`!dorms` at me and I will help you. ')
    print('<' .. linkTable[1] .. '|*This*> may also help you.\n\n' )
    print('Looking for something lost?\n' .. 'Check out the #lost_and_found channel in slack.\n\n')
    print('Looking for someone?\n' .. 'Try: http://campus.42.us.org/' .. '\n' .. 'or: https://tinder.com/?lang=en' .. '\n\n')
    print('Need help programming?\t')
    print('<' .. linkTable[2] .. '|*Yes*>    <' .. linkTable[3] .. '|*No*>\n')
    print('Too Hard?\t\t\t\t\t')
    print('<' .. linkTable[4] .. '|*Yes*>    <' .. linkTable[5] .. '|*No*>\n\n')
    print('Having a mid-life crisis?\n' .. 'Send `!whoami` to me and I will help sort out your problems.\n\n')
    print('Need to chill?\n' .. 'Send `!chill` to me.\n\n')
    print('Need a cat gif?\n' .. 'See: https://media.giphy.com/media/SBIDrovnm0wOA/giphy.gif')
end

Revision: 4934 by @kmira in #[IM @kmira] 7 months agoSlack Archive

{lua}

local linkTable = {
    'https://www.google.com/maps/dir/6600+Dumbarton+Cir,+Fremont,+CA+94555/34793+Ardentech+Ct,+Fremont,+CA+94555/',
    'https://www.amazon.com/Computer-Programming-Volumes-1-4A-Boxed/dp/0321751043',
    'https://www.42.us.org/program/42-starfleet-academy-1-year-software-engineering-program/',
    'https://www.amazon.com/Computers-Seniors-Dummies-Computer-Tech/dp/1119420318',
    'https://media.giphy.com/media/13HgwGsXF0aiGY/giphy.gif?response_id=59245c7c1f1da9f614a280d5'

}

if (args ~= 'public_override' and channel.type ~= "im") then
	print('To get access to this message send `!whelp` in a direct message to Marvin.' .. '\n')
	print('Since this is a public channel I cast shame on you. :troll:')
else
	print('Just got here?\n')
	print('You can send `!ra` me to see who we got stuck with as Resident Assistants.\n\n')
	print('Want more space in your room?\n')
	print('Try putting one bed ontop of another :exploding_head:\n' .. 'for help send me `!bed`\n\n')
	print('Wifi?\n' .. '`!wifi`?\n')
	print('Wifi-down?\n' .. '`!wifi-update`\n\n')
	print('You brought a car?\n'.. 'Try: heimdall.42.us.org' .. '\n\n')
	print('Hungry?\n' .. 'Send `!menu` to me to see whats cooking.\n')
	print('You might also want to\n' .. 'Check out:\t cantina.42.us.org' .. '\n' .. 'and:\t\t\t sesame.42.us.org' .. '\n\n')
    print('Forgot how to eat?\n' .. 'Send `!sesame` to me in a direct message.\n\n')
    print('Mailing something?\n' .. 'I got you fam. `!address` at me so I can tell you what address to use. Don\'t use the dorms one.\n\n')
    print('Not satisfied with your online order?\n' .. 'Why didn\'t you just `!store` me first?\n\n')
    print('Need to print something?\n' .. 'Send `!printer` to me.\n' .. 'Really need to print something?\n' .. 'Try: `!print`\n\n')
    print('Where are the dorms?\n' .. '`!dorms` at me and I will help you. ')
    print('<' .. linkTable[1] .. '|*This*> may also help you.\n\n' )
    print('Looking for something lost?\n' .. 'Check out the #lost_and_found channel in slack.\n\n')
    print('Looking for someone?\n' .. 'Try: http://campus.42.us.org/' .. '\n' .. 'or: https://tinder.com/?lang=en' .. '\n\n')
    print('Need help programming?\t')
    print('<' .. linkTable[2] .. '|*Yes*>    <' .. linkTable[3] .. '|*No*>\n')
    print('Too Hard?\t\t\t\t\t')
    print('<' .. linkTable[4] .. '|*Yes*>    <' .. linkTable[5] .. '|*No*>\n\n')
    print('Having a mid-life crisis?\n' .. 'Send `!whoami` to me and I will help sort out your problems.\n\n')
    print('Need to chill?\n' .. 'Send `!chill` to me.\n\n')
    print('Need a cat gif?\n' .. 'See: https://media.giphy.com/media/SBIDrovnm0wOA/giphy.gif')
end

Revision: 4933 by @kmira in #[IM @kmira] 7 months agoSlack Archive

{lua}

local linkTable = {
    'https://www.google.com/maps/dir/6600+Dumbarton+Cir,+Fremont,+CA+94555/34793+Ardentech+Ct,+Fremont,+CA+94555/',
    'https://www.amazon.com/Computer-Programming-Volumes-1-4A-Boxed/dp/0321751043',
    'https://www.42.us.org/program/42-starfleet-academy-1-year-software-engineering-program/',
    'https://www.amazon.com/Computers-Seniors-Dummies-Computer-Tech/dp/1119420318',
    'https://media.giphy.com/media/13HgwGsXF0aiGY/giphy.gif?response_id=59245c7c1f1da9f614a280d5'

}

if (args ~= 'public_override' and channel.type ~= "im") then
	print('To get access to this message send `!whelp` in a direct message to Marvin.' .. '\n')
	print('Since this is a public channel I cast shame on you. :troll:')
else
	print('Just got here?\n')
	print('You can send `!ra` me to see who we got stuck with as Resident Assistants.\n\n')
	print('Want more space in your room?\n')
	print('Try putting one bed ontop of another :exploding_head:\n' .. 'for help send me `!bed`\n\n')
	print('Wifi?\n' .. '`!wifi`?\n')
	print('Wifi-down?\n' .. '`!wifi-update`\n\n')
	print('You brought a car?\n'.. 'Try: heimdall.42.us.org' .. '\n\n')
	print('Hungry?\n' .. 'Send `!menu` to me to see whats cooking.\n')
	print('You might also want to\n' .. 'Check out:\t cantina.42.us.org' .. '\n' .. 'and:\t\t\t sesame.42.us.org' .. '\n\n')
    print('Forgot how to eat?\n' .. 'Send `!sesame` to me in a direct message.\n\n')
    print('Ordering something online?\n' .. 'I got you fam. `!address` at me so I can tell you what address to use. Don\'t use the dorms one.\n\n')
    print('Not satisfied with your online order?\n' .. 'Why didn\'t you just `!store` me first?\n\n')
    print('Need to print something?\n' .. 'Send `!printer` to me.\n' .. 'Really need to print something?\n' .. 'Try: `!print`\n\n')
    print('Where are the dorms?\n' .. '`!dorms` at me and I will help you. ')
    print('<' .. linkTable[1] .. '|*This*> may also help you.\n\n' )
    print('Looking for something lost?\n' .. 'Check out the #lost_and_found channel in slack.\n\n')
    print('Looking for someone?\n' .. 'Try: http://campus.42.us.org/' .. '\n' .. 'or: https://tinder.com/?lang=en' .. '\n\n')
    print('Need help programming?\t')
    print('<' .. linkTable[2] .. '|*Yes*>    <' .. linkTable[3] .. '|*No*>\n')
    print('Too Hard?\t\t\t\t\t')
    print('<' .. linkTable[4] .. '|*Yes*>    <' .. linkTable[5] .. '|*No*>\n\n')
    print('Having a mid-life crisis?\n' .. 'Send `!whoami` to me and I will help sort out your problems.\n\n')
    print('Need to chill?\n' .. 'Send `!chill` to me.\n\n')
    print('Need a cat gif?\n' .. 'See: https://media.giphy.com/media/SBIDrovnm0wOA/giphy.gif')
end

Revision: 4932 by @kmira in #[IM @kmira] 7 months agoSlack Archive

{lua}

local linkTable = {
    'https://www.google.com/maps/dir/6600+Dumbarton+Cir,+Fremont,+CA+94555/34793+Ardentech+Ct,+Fremont,+CA+94555/',
    'https://www.amazon.com/Computer-Programming-Volumes-1-4A-Boxed/dp/0321751043',
    'https://www.42.us.org/program/42-starfleet-academy-1-year-software-engineering-program/',
    'https://www.amazon.com/Computers-Seniors-Dummies-Computer-Tech/dp/1119420318',
    'https://media.giphy.com/media/13HgwGsXF0aiGY/giphy.gif?response_id=59245c7c1f1da9f614a280d5'

}

if (args ~= 'public_override' and channel.type ~= "im") then
	print('To get access to this message send `!whelp` in a direct message to Marvin.' .. '\n')
	print('Since this is a public channel I cast shame on you. :troll:')
else
	print('Just got here?\n')
	print('You can send `!ra` me to see who we got stuck with as Resident Assistants.\n\n')
	print('Want more space in your room?\n')
	print('Try putting one bed ontop of another :exploding_head:\n' .. 'for help send me `!bed`\n\n')
	print('Wifi?\n' .. '`!wifi`?\n')
	print('Wifi-down?\n' .. '`!wifi-update`\n\n')
	print('You brought a car?\n'.. 'Try: heimdall.42.us.org' .. '\n\n')
	print('Hungry?\n' .. 'Send `!menu` to me to see whats cooking.\n')
	print('You might also want to\n' .. 'Check out:\t cantina.42.us.org' .. '\n' .. 'and:\t\t\t sesame.42.us.org' .. '\n\n')
    print('Forgot how to eat?\n' .. 'Send `!sesame` to me in a direct message.\n\n')
    print('Ordering something online?\n' .. 'I got you fam. `!address` at me so I can tell you what address to use. Don\'t use the dorms one.\n\n')
    print('Not satisfied with your online order?\n' .. 'Why didn\'t you just `!store` me first?\n\n')
    print('Need to print something?\n' .. 'Send `!printer` to me.\n' .. 'Really need to print something?\n' .. 'Try: `!print`\n\n')
    print('Where are the dorms?\n' .. '`!dorms` at me and I will help you. ')
    print('<' .. linkTable[1] .. '|*This*> may also help you.\n\n' )
    print('Looking for something lost?\n' .. 'Check out the #lost_and_found channel in slack.\n\n')
    print('Looking for someone?\n' .. 'Try: http://campus.42.us.org/' .. '\n' .. 'or: https://tinder.com/?lang=en' .. '\n\n')
    print('Need help programming?\t')
    print('<' .. linkTable[2] .. '|*Yes*>    <' .. linkTable[3] .. '|*No*>\n')
    print('Too Hard?\t\t\t\t\t')
    print('<' .. linkTable[4] .. '|*Yes*>    <' .. linkTable[5] .. '|*No*>\n\n')
    print('Having a mid-life crisis?\n' .. 'Send `!whoami` to me and I will help sort out your problems.\n\n')
    print('Need to chill?\n' .. 'Send '!chill' to me.\n\n')
    print('Need a cat gif?\n' .. 'See: https://media.giphy.com/media/SBIDrovnm0wOA/giphy.gif')
end

Revision: 4931 by @kmira in #[IM @kmira] 7 months agoSlack Archive

{lua}

local linkTable = {
    'https://www.google.com/maps/dir/6600+Dumbarton+Cir,+Fremont,+CA+94555/34793+Ardentech+Ct,+Fremont,+CA+94555/',
    'https://www.amazon.com/Computer-Programming-Volumes-1-4A-Boxed/dp/0321751043',
    'https://www.42.us.org/program/42-starfleet-academy-1-year-software-engineering-program/',
    'https://www.amazon.com/Computers-Seniors-Dummies-Computer-Tech/dp/1119420318',
    'https://media.giphy.com/media/13HgwGsXF0aiGY/giphy.gif?response_id=59245c7c1f1da9f614a280d5'

}

if (args ~= 'public_override' and channel.type ~= "im") then
	print('To get access to this message send `!whelp` in a direct message to Marvin.' .. '\n')
	print('Since this is a public channel I cast shame on you. :troll:')
else
	print('Just got here?\n')
	print('You can send `!ra` me to see who we got stuck with as Resident Assistants.\n\n')
	print('Want more space in your room?\n')
	print('Try putting one bed ontop of another :exploding_head:\n' .. 'for help send me `!bed`\n\n')
	print('Wifi?\n' .. '`!wifi`?\n')
	print('Wifi-down?\n' .. '`!wifi-update`\n\n')
	print('You brought a car?\n'.. 'Try: heimdall.42.us.org' .. '\n\n')
	print('Hungry?\n' .. 'Send `!menu` to me to see whats cooking.\n')
	print('You might also want to\n' .. 'Check out:\t cantina.42.us.org' .. '\n' .. 'and:\t\t\t sesame.42.us.org' .. '\n\n')
    print('Forgot how to eat?\n' .. 'Send `!sesame` to me in a direct message.\n\n')
    print('Ordering something online?\n' .. 'I got you fam. `!address` at me so I can tell you what address to use. Don\'t use the dorms one.\n\n')
    print('Not satisfied with your online order?\n' .. 'Why didn\'t you just `!store` me first?\n\n')
    print('Need to print something?\n' .. 'Send `!printer` to me.\n' .. 'Really need to print something?\n' .. 'Try: `!print`\n\n')
    print('Where are the dorms?\n' .. '`!dorms` at me and I will help you. ')
    print('<' .. linkTable[1] .. '|*This*> may also help you.\n\n' )
    print('Looking for something lost?\n' .. 'Check out the #lost_and_found channel in slack.\n\n')
    print('Looking for someone?\n' .. 'Try: http://campus.42.us.org/' .. '\n' .. 'or: https://tinder.com/?lang=en' .. '\n\n')
    print('Need help programming?\t')
    print('<' .. linkTable[2] .. '|*Yes*>    <' .. linkTable[3] .. '|*No*>\n')
    print('Too Hard?\t\t\t')
    print('<' .. linkTable[4] .. '|*Yes*>    <' .. linkTable[5] .. '|*No*>\n\n')
end

Revision: 4930 by @kmira in #[IM @kmira] 7 months agoSlack Archive

{lua}

local linkTable = {
    'https://www.google.com/maps/dir/6600+Dumbarton+Cir,+Fremont,+CA+94555/34793+Ardentech+Ct,+Fremont,+CA+94555/',
    'https://www.amazon.com/Computer-Programming-Volumes-1-4A-Boxed/dp/0321751043',
    'https://www.42.us.org/program/42-starfleet-academy-1-year-software-engineering-program/',
    'https://www.amazon.com/Computers-Seniors-Dummies-Computer-Tech/dp/1119420318',
    'https://media.giphy.com/media/13HgwGsXF0aiGY/giphy.gif?response_id=59245c7c1f1da9f614a280d5'

}

if (args ~= 'public_override' and channel.type ~= "im") then
	print('To get access to this message send `!whelp` in a direct message to Marvin.' .. '\n')
	print('Since this is a public channel I cast shame on you. :troll:')
else
	print('Just got here?\n')
	print('You can send `!ra` me to see who we got stuck with as Resident Assistants.\n\n')
	print('Want more space in your room?\n')
	print('Try putting one bed ontop of another :exploding_head:\n' .. 'for help send me `!bed`\n\n')
	print('Wifi?\n' .. '`!wifi`?\n')
	print('Wifi-down?\n' .. '`!wifi-update`\n\n')
	print('You brought a car?\n'.. 'Try: heimdall.42.us.org' .. '\n\n')
	print('Hungry?\n' .. 'Send `!menu` to me to see whats cooking.\n')
	print('You might also want to\n' .. 'Check out:\t cantina.42.us.org' .. '\n' .. 'and:\t\t\t sesame.42.us.org' .. '\n\n')
    print('Forgot how to eat?\n' .. 'Send `!sesame` to me in a direct message.\n\n')
    print('Ordering something online?\n' .. 'I got you fam. `!address` at me so I can tell you what address to use. Don\'t use the dorms one.\n\n')
    print('Not satisfied with your online order?\n' .. 'Why didn\'t you just `!store` me first?\n\n')
    print('Need to print something?\n' .. 'Send `!printer` to me.\n' .. 'Really need to print something?\n' .. 'Try: `!print`\n\n')
    print('Where are the dorms?\n' .. '`!dorms` at me and I will help you. ')
    print('<' .. linkTable[1] .. '|*This*> may also help you.\n\n' )
    print('Looking for something lost?\n' .. 'Check out the #lost_and_found channel in slack.\n\n')
    print('Looking for someone?\n' .. 'Try: http://campus.42.us.org/' .. '\n' .. 'or: https://tinder.com/?lang=en' .. '\n\n')
    print('Need help programming?\t')
    print('<' .. linkTable[2] '|*Yes*>    <' .. linkTable[3] .. '|*No*>\n')
    print('Too Hard?\t\t\t')
    print('<' .. linkTable[4] '|*Yes*>    <' .. linkTable[5] .. '|*No*>\n\n')
end

Revision: 4929 by @kmira in #[IM @kmira] 7 months agoSlack Archive

{lua}

local linkTable = {
    'https://www.google.com/maps/dir/6600+Dumbarton+Cir,+Fremont,+CA+94555/34793+Ardentech+Ct,+Fremont,+CA+94555/'
}

if (args ~= 'public_override' and channel.type ~= "im") then
	print('To get access to this message send `!whelp` in a direct message to Marvin.' .. '\n')
	print('Since this is a public channel I cast shame on you. :troll:')
else
	print('Just got here?\n')
	print('You can send `!ra` me to see who we got stuck with as Resident Assistants.\n\n')
	print('Want more space in your room?\n')
	print('Try putting one bed ontop of another :exploding_head:\n' .. 'for help send me `!bed`\n\n')
	print('Wifi?\n' .. '`!wifi`?\n')
	print('Wifi-down?\n' .. '`!wifi-update`\n\n')
	print('You brought a car?\n'.. 'Try: heimdall.42.us.org' .. '\n\n')
	print('Hungry?\n' .. 'Send `!menu` to me to see whats cooking.\n')
	print('You might also want to\n' .. 'Check out: cantina.42.us.org' .. '\n' .. 'and:\t\t   sesame.42.us.org' .. '\n\n')
    print('Forgot how to eat?\n' .. 'Send `!sesame` to me in a direct message.\n\n')
    print('Ordering something online?\n' .. 'I got you fam. `!address` at me so I can tell you what address to use. Don\'t use the dorms one.\n\n')
    print('Not satisfied with your online order?\n' .. 'Why didn\'t you just `!store` me first?\n\n')
    print('Need to print something?\n' .. 'Send `!printer` to me.\n' .. 'Really need to print something?\n' .. 'Try: `!print`\n\n')
    print('Where are the dorms?\n' .. '`!dorms` at me and I will help you. ')
    print('<' .. linkTable[1] .. '|*This*> may also help you.\n\n' )
end

Revision: 4928 by @kmira in #[IM @kmira] 7 months agoSlack Archive

{lua}

local linkTable = {
    'https://www.google.com/maps/dir/6600+Dumbarton+Cir,+Fremont,+CA+94555/34793+Ardentech+Ct,+Fremont,+CA+94555/'
}

if (args ~= 'public_override' and channel.type ~= "im") then
	print('To get access to this message send `!whelp` in a direct message to Marvin.' .. '\n')
	print('Since this is a public channel I cast shame on you. :troll:')
else
	print('Just got here?\n')
	print('You can send `!ra` me to see who we got stuck with as Resident Assistants.\n\n')
	print('Want more space in your room?\n')
	print('Try putting one bed ontop of another :exploding_head:\n' .. 'for help send me `!bed`\n\n')
	print('Wifi?\n' .. '`!wifi`?\n')
	print('Wifi-down?\n' .. '`!wifi-update`\n\n')
	print('You brought a car?\n'.. 'Try: heimdall.42.us.org' .. '\n\n')
	print('Hungry?\n' .. 'Send `!menu` to me to see whats cooking.\n')
	print('You might also want to\n' .. 'Check out: cantina.42.us.org' .. '\n' .. 'and:\t\t sesame.42.us.org' .. '\n\n')
    print('Forgot how to eat?\n' .. 'Send `!sesame` to me in a direct message.\n\n')
    print('Ordering something online?\n' .. 'I got you fam. `!address` at me so I can tell you what address to use. Don\'t use the dorms one.\n\n')
    print('Not satisfied with your online order?\n' .. 'Why didn\'t you just `!store` me first?\n\n')
    print('Need to print something?\n' .. 'Send `!printer` to me.\n' .. 'Really need to print something?\n' .. 'Try: `!print`\n\n')
    print('Where are the dorms?\n' .. '`!dorms` at me and I will help you.')
    print('<' .. linkTable[1] .. '|This> may also help you.\n\n' )
end

Revision: 4927 by @kmira in #[IM @kmira] 7 months agoSlack Archive

{lua}

local linkTable = {
    'https://www.google.com/maps/dir/6600+Dumbarton+Cir,+Fremont,+CA+94555/34793+Ardentech+Ct,+Fremont,+CA+94555/'
}

if (args ~= 'public_override' and channel.type ~= "im") then
	print('To get access to this message send `!whelp` in a direct message to Marvin.' .. '\n')
	print('Since this is a public channel I cast shame on you. :troll:')
else
	print('Just got here?\n')
	print('You can send `!ra` me to see who we got stuck with as Resident Assistants.\n\n')
	print('Want more space in your room?\n')
	print('Try putting one bed ontop of another :exploding_head:\n' .. 'for help send me `!bed`\n\n')
	print('Wifi?\n' .. '`!wifi`?\n')
	print('Wifi-down?\n' .. '`!wifi-update`\n\n')
	print('You brought a car?\n'.. 'Try: heimdall.42.us.org' .. '\n\n')
	print('Hungry?\n' .. 'Send `!menu` to me to see whats cooking.\n')
	print('You might also want to\n' .. 'Check out: cantina.42.us.org' .. '\n' .. 'and:\t\t sesame.42.us.org' .. '\n\n')
    print('Forgot how to eat?\n' .. 'Send `!sesame` to me in a direct message.\n\n')
    print('Ordering something online?\n' .. 'I got you fam. `!address` at me so I can tell you what address to use. Don\'t use the dorms one.\n\n')
    print('Not satisfied with your online order?\n' .. 'Why didn\'t you just `!store` me first?\n\n')
    print('Need to print something?\n' .. 'Send `!printer` to me.\n' .. 'Really need to print something?\n' .. 'Try: `!print`\n\n')
    print('Where are the dorms?\n' .. '`!dorms` at me and I will help you.')
    print('<' .. linkTable[0] .. '|This> may also help you.\n\n' )
end

Revision: 4926 by @kmira in #[IM @kmira] 7 months agoSlack Archive

{lua}

if (args ~= 'public_override' and channel.type ~= "im") then
	print('To get access to this message send `!whelp` in a direct message to Marvin.' .. '\n')
	print('Since this is a public channel I cast shame on you. :troll:')
else
	print('Just got here?\n')
	print('You can send `!ra` me to see who we got stuck with as Resident Assistants.\n\n')
	print('Want more space in your room?\n')
	print('Try putting one bed ontop of another :exploding_head:\n' .. 'for help send me `!bed`\n\n')
	print('Wifi?\n' .. '`!wifi`?\n')
	print('Wifi-down?\n' .. '`!wifi-update`\n\n')
	print('You brought a car?\n'.. 'Try: heimdall.42.us.org' .. '\n\n')
	print('Hungry?\n' .. 'Send `!menu` to me to see whats cooking.\n')
	print('You might also want to\n' .. 'Check out: cantina.42.us.org' .. '\n' .. 'and:\t sesame.42.us.org' .. '\n\n')
    print('Forgot how to eat?\n' .. 'Send `!sesame` to me in a direct message.\n\n')
    print('Ordering something online?\n' .. 'I got you fam. `!address` at me so I can tell you what address to use. Don\'t use the dorms one.\n\n')
    print('Not satisfied with your online order?\n' .. 'Why didn\'t you just `!store` me first?\n\n')
    print('Need to print something?\n' .. 'Send `!printer` to me.\n' .. 'Really need to print something?\n' .. 'Try: `!print`\n\n')
end

Revision: 4925 by @kmira in #[IM @kmira] 7 months agoSlack Archive

{lua}

if (args ~= 'public_override' and channel.type ~= "im") then
	print('To get access to this message send `!whelp` in a direct message to Marvin.' .. '\n')
	print('Since this is a public channel I cast shame on you. :troll:')
else
	print('Just got here?\n')
	print('You can send `!ra` me to see who we got stuck with as Resident Assistants.\n\n')
	print('Want more space in your room?\n')
	print('Try putting one bed ontop of another :exploding_head:\n' .. 'for help send me `!bed`\n\n')
	print('Wifi?\n' .. '`!wifi`?\n')
	print('Wifi-down?\n' .. '`!wifi-update`\n\n')
	print('You brought a car?\n'.. 'Try: heimdall.42.us.org' .. '\n\n')
	print('Hungry?\n' .. 'Send `!menu` to me to see whats cooking.\n')
	print('You might also want to\n' .. 'Check out: cantina.42.us.org' .. '\n' .. 'and: sesame.42.us.org' .. '\n\n')
end

Revision: 4924 by @kmira in #[IM @kmira] 7 months agoSlack Archive

{lua}

if (args ~= 'public_override' and channel.type ~= "im") then
	print('To get access to this message send `!whelp` in a direct message to Marvin.' .. '\n')
	print('Since this is a public channel I cast shame on you. :troll:')
else
	print('Just got here?\n')
	print('You can send `!ra` me to see who we got stuck with as Resident Assistants.\n\n')
	print('Want more space in your room?\n')
	print('Try putting one bed ontop of another :exploding_head:\n' .. 'for help send me `!bed`\n\n')
	print('Wifi?\n' .. '`!wifi`?\n')
	print('Wifi-down?\n' .. '`!wifi-update`\n\n')
	print('You brought a car?\n'.. 'Try: heimdall.42.us.org' .. '\n\n')
	print('Hungry?\n' .. 'Send `!menu` to me to see whats cooking.\n')
	print('You might also want to\n' .. 'Check out: cantina.42.us.org' .. '\n' .. 'and: sesame.42.us.org' .. '\n\n')
    print('Forgot how to eat?\n' .. 'Send `!sesame` to me in a direct message.\n\n')
    print('Ordering something online?\n' .. 'I got you fam. `!address` at me so I can tell you what address to use. Don't use the dorms one.\n\n')
    print('Not satisfied with your online order?\n' .. 'Why didn\'t you just `!store` me first?\n\n')
    print('Need to print something?\n' .. 'Send `!printer` to me.\n' .. 'Really need to print something?\n' .. 'Try: `!print`\n\n')
end

Revision: 4923 by @kmira in #[IM @kmira] 7 months agoSlack Archive

{lua}

if (args ~= 'public_override' and channel.type ~= "im") then
	print('To get access to this message send `!whelp` in a direct message to Marvin.' .. '\n')
	print('Since this is a public channel I cast shame on you. :troll:')
else
	print('Just got here?\n')
	print('You can send `!ra` me to see who we got stuck with as Resident Assistants.\n\n')
	print('Want more space in your room?\n')
	print('Try putting one bed ontop of another :exploding_head:\n' .. 'for help send me `!bed`\n\n')
	print('Wifi?\n' .. '`!wifi`?\n')
	print('Wifi-down?\n' .. '`!wifi-update`\n\n')
	print('You brought a car?\n'.. 'Try: heimdall.42.us.org' .. '\n\n')
	print('Hungry?\n' .. 'Send `!menu` to me to see whats cooking.\n')
	print('You might also want to\n' .. 'Check out: cantina.42.us.org' .. '\n' .. 'and: sesame.42.us.org' .. '\n\n')
    print('Forgot how to eat?\n' .. 'Send `!sesame` to me in a direct message.\n\n')
    print('Ordering something online?\n' .. 'I got you fam. `!address` at me so I can tell you what address to use. Don't use the dorms one.\n\n')
    print('Not satisfied with your online order?\n' .. 'Why didn't you just `!store` me first?\n\n')
    print('Need to print something?\n' .. 'Send `!printer` to me.\n' .. 'Really need to print something?\n' .. 'Try: `!print`\n\n')
end

Revision: 4922 by @kmira in #[IM @kmira] 7 months agoSlack Archive

{lua}
local who = string.format("\60@%s\62", user.id)

local text = {
}

if (args ~= 'public_override' and channel.type ~= "im") then
	print('To get access to this message send `!whelp` in a direct message to Marvin.' .. '\n')
	print('Since this is a public channel I cast shame on you. :troll:')
else
	print('Just got here?\n')
	print('You can send `!ra` me to see who we got stuck with as Resident Assistants.\n\n')
	print('Want more space in your room?\n')
	print('Try putting one bed ontop of another :exploding_head:\n' .. 'for help send me `!bed`\n\n')
	print('Wifi?\n' .. '`!wifi`?\n')
	print('Wifi-down?\n' .. '`!wifi-update`\n\n')
	print('You brought a car?\n'.. 'Try: heimdall.42.us.org' .. '\n\n')
	print('Hungry?\n' .. 'Send `!menu` to me to see whats cooking.\n')
	print('You might also want to\n' .. 'Check out: cantina.42.us.org' .. '\n' .. 'and: sesame.42.us.org' .. '\n\n')
    print('Forgot how to eat?\n' .. 'Send '!sesame' to me in a direct message.\n\n')
    print('Ordering something online?\n' .. 'I got you fam. '!address' at me so I can tell you what address to use. Don't use the dorms one.\n\n')
    print('Not satisfied with your online order?\n' .. 'Why didn't you just '!store' me first?\n\n')
    print('Need to print something?\n' .. 'Send `!printer` to me.\n' .. 'Really need to print something?\n' .. 'Try: `!print`\n\n')
end

Revision: 4921 by @kmira in #[IM @kmira] 7 months agoSlack Archive

{lua}
local who = string.format("\60@%s\62", user.id)

local text = {
}

if (args ~= 'public_override' and channel.type ~= "im") then
	print('To get access to this message send `!whelp` in a direct message to Marvin.' .. '\n')
	print('Since this is a public channel I cast shame on you. :troll:')
else
	print('Just got here?\n')
	print('You can send `!ra` me to see who we got stuck with as Resident Assistants.\n\n')
	print('Want more space in your room?\n')
	print('Try putting one bed ontop of another :exploding_head:\n' .. 'for help send me `!bed`\n\n')
	print('Wifi?\n' .. '`!wifi`?\n')
end

Revision: 4920 by @kmira in #[IM @kmira] 7 months agoSlack Archive

{lua}
local who = string.format("\60@%s\62", user.id)

local text = {
}

if (args ~= 'public_override' and channel.type ~= "im") then
	print('To get access to this message send `!whelp` in a direct message to Marvin.' .. '\n')
	print('Since this is a public channel I cast shame on you. :troll:')
else
	print('Just got here?\n')
	print('You can send `!ra` me to see who we got stuck with as Resident Assistants.\n\n')
	print('Want more space in your room?\n')
end

Revision: 4919 by @kmira in #[IM @kmira] 7 months agoSlack Archive

{lua}
local who = string.format("\60@%s\62", user.id)

local text = {
}

if (args ~= 'public_override' and channel.type ~= "im") then
	print('To get access to this message send `!whelp` in a direct message to Marvin.' .. '\n')
	print('Since this is a public channel I cast shame on you. :troll:')
else
	print('Just got here?\n')
	print('You can send `!ra` me to see who we got stuck with as Resident Assistants.\n\n')
	print('Want more space in your room?\n')
	print('Try putting one bed ontop of another :exploding_head:\n' .. 'for help send me `!bed`\n\n')
	print('Wifi?\n' .. '`!wifi`?\n')
	print('Wifi-down?\n' .. '`!wifi-update`\n\n')
	print('You brought a car?\n'.. 'Try: heimdall.42.us.org' .. \n\n')
	print('Hungry?\n' .. 'Send `!menu` to me to see whats cooking.\n')
	print('You might also want to\n' .. 'Check out: cantina.42.us.org' .. '\n' .. 'and: sesame.42.us.org' .. '\n\n')
    print('Forgot how to eat?\n' .. 'Send '!sesame' to me in a direct message.\n\n')
    print('Ordering something online?\n' .. 'I got you fam. '!address' at me so I can tell you what address to use. Don't use the dorms one.\n\n')
    print('Not satisfied with your online order?\n' .. 'Why didn't you just '!store' me first?\n\n')
    print('Need to print something?\n' .. 'Send `!printer` to me.\n' .. 'Really need to print something?\n' .. 'Try: `!print`\n\n')
end

Revision: 4918 by @kmira in #[IM @kmira] 7 months agoSlack Archive

{lua}
local who = string.format("\60@%s\62", user.id)

local text = {
}

if (args ~= 'public_override' and channel.type ~= "im") then
	print('To get access to this message send `!whelp` in a direct message to Marvin.' .. '\n')
	print('Since this is a public channel I cast shame on you. :troll:')
else
	print('Just got here?'\n')
	print('You can send `!ra` me to see who we got stuck with as Resident Assistants.' .. '\n\n')
	print('Want more space in your room?\n')
	print('Try putting one bed ontop of another :exploding_head:\n' .. 'for help send me `!bed`\n\n')
	print('Wifi?\n' .. '`!wifi`?\n')
	print('Wifi-down?\n' .. '`!wifi-update`\n\n')
	print('You brought a car?\n'.. 'Try: heimdall.42.us.org' .. \n\n')
	print('Hungry?\n' .. 'Send `!menu` to me to see whats cooking.\n')
	print('You might also want to\n' .. 'Check out: cantina.42.us.org' .. '\n' .. 'and: sesame.42.us.org' .. '\n\n')
    print('Forgot how to eat?\n' .. 'Send '!sesame' to me in a direct message.\n\n')
    print('Ordering something online?\n' .. 'I got you fam. '!address' at me so I can tell you what address to use. Don't use the dorms one.\n\n')
    print('Not satisfied with your online order?\n' .. 'Why didn't you just '!store' me first?\n\n')
    print('Need to print something?\n' .. 'Send `!printer` to me.\n' .. 'Really need to print something?\n' .. 'Try: `!print`\n\n')
end